10 hours until Noumea...

I wrote my testimony the other day.
I'd like to share it with the Church like Steve was saying last wk.
'Cept then I'd have to ask him.
Ahh scary.

Today in French Mrs. Boshier was teaching us (quite reluctantly might I add) pick-up line type things to say in French. On my request. Just in case we meet some hot French soldiers. Or we can just speak in English to the 2 other all-boys schools that are coming with us...they are most prob. staying in the same hotel as us...Eh'xcelent...no wonder so many of the other girls are extra excited to go on this trip..Haha. Mrs Boshier is a champ. She can be really strict, but really funny as well in her own way ("That is soo junior school" "Bobo in da house" "It's diiiivvviiiine girls, it's diiivvviiine") and she's a REALLY GOOD teacher. She really is great.

Jet Set

A riotous day without teacher supervison thanks to the Yr 12 breakfast running overtime..as per usual. The lack of rules being enforced in my school in the past few weeks really does astound me.
The people in the "Spellbound" video are really scary. I mean come on, repeat after me - "IT'S ONLY SPELLING!!"
Yr 12 review was so not as funny as last year's. Must have been the influence of Rach ;)
Our Middle School Performing Arts dance is growing on me. We have to edit the video for ICT. I'm kinda happy with most of my performence. Except that atrocious round-off. Don't think I'll ever get over that. I really should have done the walkover...
Leaving for Noumea 2moz. Happy, nervous, kinda sad....all mi stuff is there waiting to be packed. Straight after school I'm off. I'll miss you all.

Coffee was nice. I like being with Luke. He makes me smile and feel special.

My parents are coming home from the airport as I speak (or write...to be more politically correct) And my brothers are on a plane. Going to Melbourne 4 4 days. September must be a big travelling time.

I'm still kinda nervous about Noumea. What if I won't be able to say anything. I hope everyone gets to the airport on time. Then we can go through early and have some DUTY-FREE SHOPPING!! Shoes would be nice...I do have AUD$110 (as opposed to XPF$18,000, just in case you were wondering about the use of AUD ;) ) to burn... Eh'xcelent
Oh gosh I can't believe this trip is coming so soon. It always seemed like I was constantly saying..."Yeh, Noumea in so and so months" and now I can finally say "Noumea tomorrow" It's kinda surreal.
I am excited though. Gosh gosh gosh gosh gosh
Wow I just noticed I can almost touch type!!
Blogging off,
the jittery traveller,
Beth

I am so fat

I was crying today. Honestly I'm such a wuss sometimes. But it really is sad to see Melinda go. We made more signs again. A big one this time. Once again we were called "cute" and "gorgeous" by the Yr 12's. I signed Melinda's dress. I didn't think I'd miss her that much. But really you don't know what you got until it's about to go.
Went and saw Baby Thomas this afternoon. He's so beautiful. The softest of skin. He's just so perfect. Gosh I love kids. Can't wait for my own. We all just stood there looking at him 4 ages and ages. I'll post some pictures of him later. Only 5 days old...oh so beautiful!!
Noumea on Friday!! Excited...nervous...many differing emotions!!
Gotta go, going out to dinner!!
Au revoir!

Melinda's Last Day *tear*

It was Melinda, our Yr 12 Friend's last bus day today (she's our bus friend, her actual last day is on Thursday) It was so sad. We went into the art rooms at lunch and made posters and cards for her, and KC brought Lindt chocolates and party poppers. She knew something was up in the bus when we kept on laughing, and by the end, she knew what was happening when we were handing out our posters through fits of laughers to everyone. We blew party poppers out the window, screamed our ritual "Bye Melinda" for the last time and held up our posters. Outside of the bus she stopped to read them and smiled as she waved and walked away. It was so sad!! We've gone so far with Melinda. She was our bus friend since like Yr 7. We started off screaming "Bye Melinda" and she was all embaresssed and would never wave back or say bye, and now she comes up to us and hugs us in the corridors and jokes around with us and has nice conversations. We've become friends and it's so sad to see her go!
Oh, now I've made myself all sad. :(
Bye Melinda...

Brothers

Poor Michael. He finds something he likes then it ends. He told me today that he is sad that Kids Club is not going to be on until next year because it's fun and he wants to see Jesse.
I'm going to work on Michael. As oldest I feel responsibility to teach him what is right. How to act, about God. Before it's too late. Like Callum. Callum makes me sad. He doesn't believe in God. It's so hard to fathom. Jesus is the truth, the way, the life. It's so hard to think how people can't understand that. Callum believes in all that stupid "us evolving from apes" stuff. He just won't listen to me anymore. He can't understand the concept of my faith. It's so sad.

My day...the abridged version

I have had the best day today.
Quite strange for a Monday.
Mondays don't usually agree with me.

The day didn't look like it would start off very well...even though I had a great night/day yesterday..very refreshing...off to a new start...realised how to get there...God is the best and only way. I wrote up a list of all the things that I have done wrong and all my bad attributes, then prayed and asked God to help me through it, acknowledged that I was wrong to think I could do it myself, asked for forgiveness and a renewal...then ripped up the paper into a million little pieces, then put it into a box and away in the bin. It was nice...like a weight being lifted off my shoulders...

So anyway, I awoke with a new perspective.
CCH was boring because we had that Ms McNamara person. French was...french. But I got 2 sit next to Ali P which was good. I miss sitting next to Ali. Silly Mr. Ryan. Ali came 2 Church last night!! I was so happy!! :D And she REALLY liked it as well. Said it was very involving and energetic and fun and stuff. And her family are friends with the Stanis's or sumthing which was kinda weird. Ali and Steve Stanis had this little mini reunion rite in front of me. Quite amusing. And now Ali is going to keep on coming to Church...every week. And she's bringing Bec and Jen now which will be cool!! Mel and I are such evangelists we are! How many Rosie people are here now???

Tutor Group with Bates...what more can I say? Our tutor group is the Club Med of Tutor Groups..we have many groupies... We asked Bates arkward questions, and Shannon was back to her usual self again. The pressure sure is back on me. Jacki and I had a crazy salsa dance. Then we mauled Bates and stole his glasses and hat then put them in the bush. Then I pretended to be Bates and Jacki was Renee (his gf) and I pretended to "rape" Jacki. Haha. Good times....

Hammy was away for English and we had Ms Wheatley so we didn't work. Mel smashed a chair into my head. It was extreamly funny, although painful. We bludged class 4 20mins to get an icepack, and tried to get Loz 2 join us, but she is too goody-goody. Mel and I spent th rest of the class having a jolly old time. It's good 2 catch up with Mel.

Lunch was fun singing the Undignified song. "I'll become, even more undignified than this (some would say it's foolishness) but I'll become, even more undignified than this (some would say it's foolishness) but I will dance, I will sing, to be mad, for my King, Nothing Lord is hindering, a passion in my soul! I will dance, I will sing, to be mad, for my King, Nothing Lord is hindering, a passion in my soul!" It felt good to walk around singing that at the top of my voice, it felt like in a way I was pronouncing my Christianity, proudly and unashamadly.

Science...Mel and I stole Annie's chips and she got annoyed. It was funny though. Even though we kinda felt bad. Mel got in trouble from Gray for eating. And we did an experiment in neutralising hydrochloric acid. It smelt so yummy and we wanted to drink it. We asked Gray if we could and she said no. She's no fun. Mrs. Hallet would have played along. I miss Mrs. Hallet so much!! But we got Steph to drink some. Of course nothing happened. Cuz it was neutralised. Then Gray was going on about how "No one drinks experiments in her class!!" and we were all cacking ourselves cuz we knew we had. I don't like Mrs. Gray. She's no fun, hates us and pretends to know what she is talking bout when she doesn't. Then Mel and Annie and I started attacking each other and running around (Mrs. Hallet lets us do this!!) and we got in trouble and had to "see her after class". Now we have to sit down the front!! Argghhh... But it was still funny!!!

CCG was by far the best class of the day. We had Ms. Wheatley again. And Jacki and Kiera and I had an exclusive group. "It" (aka. JULIA!!!) was not allowed 2 join. It was so funny. And we had a ceremony to mourn the death of "Bobette" and I was the Reverend. Then we were running around the class scremaing and throwing those big globe balls around while Mrs. Wheatly let us. It was so cool. She used 2 be a bum and mean and she has turned totally cool now!! We didn't do any work at all. Haha. I'm so gonna fail this exam. Jacki and Kiera make me laugh so much. Then I abandoned my group and had a nice convo with Jen and Bec and Ali and I'm still so xcited bout them all coming to Church!!

So that was my day...the abridged version. I felt like a long blog. Seeing as I havent blogged properly in ages. Mi computer was stuffed and the guy fixed it and stuffed more stuff and I spent like 2 frustrating hours fixing it and now its all finally fixed!! yay!!

Blogging off,
Beth

The Seasons of Change

Wow. I haven't blogged in a while.
Various things. I have been quite upset latley. People judging me. My relationship with God. It is totally not their place. I have actually been closer to God than I used to. Contrary to "popular belief", you could put it.

Some fun things have happened:
Streakers through Roseville
Hectic Fridays
Braces getting off date finalised - November 18
Movies at Luke's
Shopping Sprees 4 Noumea
Adorable little 2-yr-olds called Mischa
Some quality Luke and Beth time. :D
Carla giving birth to a beautiful baby boy called Thomas on Saturday

Casey, you're a great friend. Everyone else abandons me, and yet you are still there. Thankyou so much for listening to me when I am upset and believing what I say, and through all this, knowing who I am, and knowing that I am still here, and haven't changed.
I am very in love. My love can keep me alive through all this shit that's going on.
Our group is in ruins. It's stuffed. V. stuffed. We used 2 be such nice people together and things have just changed. Maybe it's because we r always divided over everything.
I'm sick of all this shit in my life. I'm sick of everyone getting pissed at me for no reason. I can take responsibility for things I do wrong. And I have. I have apologised to the people I have been a bitch too. But when people get angry at me for nothing, all the time. It's just too much.
Through all this though God can be my strength. Jeremiah 29:11-13. I really need church again. A refresh.

The pink thongs and yellow top... ;)

Acid Fights

Once again, yet another infamous ICT lesson.
Yesterday was kind of a shock. A rude awakening shall I put it.
This Uniform debate is getting out of hand.
Annie and I had an acid fight in Science just before. OF course we didn't know it was acid until it started burning.
We found it underneath the tap in a puddle that looked suspiciously like water, and being v. v. hot like we were, we splashed it all over each other and wiped it on our arms and faces. Then Annie was like, "Hey Beth...are you sure that is actually water? Cuz I'm kinda burning..." and I'm like "Shit! Me too...!!!" It was hilarious!
Then we continued to flick acid-water at each other...even thought we knew what it was
Acid fights all the way!!

Creative Cuttings

I just made a top.
It was a $180 Trent Nathan designer top that I cut up and decorated.
Thankfully I didn't pay 4 it. My aunty did.
But it was so dull and white before. I like it much better now.
Mum liked it because it had romantic French things on it.
"Je t'aime"
"Dans mon coeur"
"Pays du soleil et de la lumiere"
"Je suis tres loin de vous et cependant je vous touche chaque jour...tu es mon petit ami et je t'aime"
"Voulez-vous couchez avec moi, ce soir?"
"Vous avez le privilege d'ete ne dans mon coeur..."
She said I'd have to take it to Noumea with me. :D
I've put sequins and beads on it and it's blue and says Trent Nathan..(i 'mose as well flaunt the designer label :P) and there is this gold and white flower i made out of this random material and stuck on.

I quite like when my creative flair comes out...

I don't know what to do.
I have this yucki feeling in the pit of my stomach and I don't feel like I am really here. I am answering things in a monotone and stuff doesn't really matta.
I didn't think it would affect me that much.
I just don't know what is going on with me nemore.

"Forgiveness is like grace...an undeserved gift"

OC Obsession

The OC. Such a controversial topic....
It seems everyone either LOVES it or HATES it.
Is there an in between? Right now I am in an in between.
I succumbed to peer pressure and watched The OC on Monday and Tuesday night.
Monday's wasn't all that fantastic. Funny, yes. Thanks to Seth. Not that great though. Last night's was more cute. Ryan just made it to Marissa with like a millisecond to go 'till New Years and I was like RUUUUUNNN!! And then he got there, and they kissed and he said "I love you" for the first time and it was so cute!
Gemma thinks I have "transitioned" and "crossed the line"
Yes sure, I did find the OC song guitar chords and play it, and look at the website. But I was just teasing. It's funny to tease Gemma. Hehehe....
But I don't think I have transitioned yet...

Who loves the OC?

Je suis très loin de vous et cependant je vous touche chaque jour...tu es mon petit ami est je t'aime..

Uniform "Adjustments"

Summer Uniform today.
So many rules broken.
Sure I contributed...but...;)
It's funny how quickly the rules start to get broken...and how quickly the Yr 7's learn 2 break 'em...
Let's see: (mi most common uniform "adjustments")
1. Short skirt, much much shorter than "regulation" length. (Anna and Hannah found it quite amusing that my skirt was short, then I informed them that this was my "long" skirt, and then they found it even more hilarious, and wouldn't give up on it! Wait, actually it's not even a skirt!! It's a dress, just looks like a skirt when the jumper is over the top, and everyone seems to call it a skirt...hehe funni)
2. Jumper over dress (it looks much better, as opposed 2 a BLAZER!! ugh...)
3. Top button undone (seriously, they should just give up on this rule (top buttons done up)...it's neva gonna change. What are they trying to do, strangle us with our dresses?!)
4. Socks pulled up (the funny thing is, when a school says socks have to be up, everyone wants them down, when people say they must be down (aka. our boring school) people want them up, (aka. me and the rest of the world!!)

I personally think all these changes make the uniform look much nicer.
I wonder why the school disagrees with me? ;)

Bible Fights

I have decided that I would not like to have a bible fight with Tom.
That man knows too much.
I like having bible fights with Mum though:

"Mum (on phone): Yes! We should def. get revenge on that HORRIBLE lady!! I mean, gosh! Saying things like that about Kambora so people will go to her school instead of ours...and behind our backs too! She deserves it..Let's plot something!!
Beth: (piping up from the computer) Mum, I don't think you should do that! Do I have to remind you of 2 Corinthians 5:10??
Mum: (sceptically, thinking I have made a random verse up off the top of my head) Oh yeh, and what does that say?
Beth: For we must all appear before the judgement seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad
Mum: (sounding surprised) Well....may i remind you of....ummm....Genesis 1:3....
Beth: (laughing in disbelief how much this is like the Simpsons) And God said "Let there be light"..?!?! Mum!!
Mum: (laughing) Well...(back to talking to her friend on the phone) My holy daughter has just proved me wrong...

I may have won against Mum.
But I don't think I'd have a chance in hell against Tom.
I have limited bible verses which I can quote off the top of my head that come in handy at times like these.
Although it is amusing when they do. :D

Haha. This American guy rang just then and wanted to speak to my Mum. When I told him she wasn't there he asked if he could call her on her "cell phone"
I was so amused.

Having discussions with Michael about the Freemans is quite an amsuing venture

Some thoughts:

Everyone looks so little in Yr 7, only in hindsight does one notice though

Thoroughly cleaning rooms uncovers strange things

It's funny how friendships can fade and reignite like "that" (clicks fingers)

Long car trips provoke strange trains of thought

You never get used to waking up at obscene hours of the morning

You can do so much more after a good sleep in

Parents are from another planet

Some people just can't accept that you can have a relationship with a guy that is competley friendship only

Procrastination works in the short-term but is quite bad in the long run

People are so critical, please, love people for who they are

The world is superficial and falling apart

A love of money is fickle

How do you ever deal with great loss?

Michael is so cute. He really enjoyed Kids Club. He and Jesse are friends. It's so cute. I knew they would be. They are so alike.
But the thing that really cracked me up, was when Michael said: "Jesse really looks like Luke! Except his hair is a litte more...flat"

i am annoyed...at bitchy, backstabbing friends and mean, unreasonable and restrictive parents!

The Hopes of a 13-yr-Old

While rummaging through old documents of mine the otha night, I discovered a list I had written on New Years Eve, when I was 13. I thought it was sweet, so I decided I'd share it with you:

"100 Things to Do Before I Die"
In no particular order:

1. Have at least one great boyfriend

2. Go to France

3. Speak fluent French

4. Open a restaurant

5. Have a career that I enjoy that involves young children

6. Don't have sex before I'm married

7. Have children!

8. Get married!

9. Be happy, truly happy, with every aspect of myself and my life

10. Go to Florence and Rome

11. Become good friends with Sarah

12. Catch a fish

13. Write a book

14. Fall in love

15. Cry, really cry, for no reason at all

16. Gain more self-confidence

17. Become a better person

18. Become the best gymnast and ice skater I can possibly be

19. Look back on my life and be happy with it

20. Lose weight

21. I want my first kiss to be special

22. Help/save a child's life

23. Stick to my beliefs no matter what, always stand my ground, don't let anyone make me do what I don't want to do.

24. Be able to tell people what I really think about them (but with tact)

25. Run around the streets at night with friends

26. Go to America

27. Become independant

28. Do something totally stupid but within reason, if that makes sense

29. Help Matt and Jess

30. Be the nicest person I possibly can be

31. Swim in a fountain

32. Please God

33. Give the perfect present

34. Make someone really happy

35. Swim with dolphins

36. Make a proper website

37. Write a script for "Charmed"

38. Go back to Fiji and take my children

39. Get a job at Boost

40. Complete my Duke of Edinburgh award

41. Go to a deserted island

42. Go to a new theme park

43. Have another catamaran and/or sailing boat ride

44. Not be alone

45. Read a book that makes me laugh and cry

46. Throw a really good New Year's Eve Party

(and that's where it finished)
It's funny to look back on my hopes from when I was younger.
Some I have already done (and thanks to all the people in my life who have helped me do that)
and some I just don't understand what I was talking bout! (like no. 29!! ???)
But it was sweet none-the-less

Well I have had a hectic, sleep-deprived, busy 2days.
Thursday, I had physio and Noumea meeting afta school. School was eventful. Yr 7's stole our seats so we sat with them and overpowered them. Jess had a "Turrets attack" as Hanni would call it, and Kat threw water over everyone. Then Jess was rushed to hospital, cuz she fell over and Han tripped over her neck, so Jess couldn't move her neck. She's in a neck brace now. I must admit it was quite amusing at the time. Poor clumsy, accident-prone Jess.
Then Friday was sooo long. I had gym in the morning, and Laura was being a bitch. Gosh that girl can hold a grudge, she's hated all of us ever since we were 2 mins late 2 the stupid IGSSA gym presentation, and she said "we were an embaressment to the school, and didn't deserve a flower or the right to be there". And she said 2day at gym, that none of us were "good enough to even be proud of our efforts, and we would just embaress the school at IGSSA" I think she is a totally horrible person.
I am excited bout Aimee though. I've invited lots of people. I hope they all come. I invited Ali P and she said that she would prob. come which is good!! Yay! Mr. Ryan was mean 2 her in Maths and she was crying.
In Science Mrs.Hallet told us how she wouldn't be back 4 the rest of the term because she had to go have an operation. We were sooo worried. She ended up telling Mel and I why she was going (even though it was a bit personal) We were both really upset (she's like our fave teacher) and told her we'd pray for her.
Then at lunch Mel, Bec and I went to the art rooms and made this massive card for her. It was crappy quality, very "hand-made" but it is the thought that counts. It was a funny card-making lunch time. We delivered it to her in her class 10mins after the bell, and all the Yr 12's thought we were cute, and "awwww'd"" us.
So we were 10mins late to this rape/self-defence talk we were having. That guy is hilarious. We were just in FITS of laughter the whole 2hr talk. And he's coming back nxt wk and the wk afta. Some scary statistics he told us: 90% of all rapes are committed by some-one you know and trust, (guys!!!) one in three women will be raped before they are 26 (or sumthing like that), a 19yr old rapist in jail has committed on average about 5-10 rapes, a 21-yr old rapist in jail has committed an average of 200-300 rapes, and the average age of all rapists is 26. Now that stuff's scary!!!
And he told us some strategys to get out of rape and stuff like that. But he was seriously hilarious!!
Then I had Gym Grand Prix at St. Catherine's. The bus trip there was funny. We held up a sign on the back of the bus that said "Honk 4 Roseville Gymnastics Team" We got 20 honks altogether!! Yay!! ONe guy was trying to write us a note back, but there wasn't enough time! There was one freaky old hobo guy in the car who was winking at us, and some hot ones in trucks who honked a lot. :D hehehe, and an annoying lady who wouldn't honk, and gave us evil eyes, and so we wrote her another note saying "Honk Damn You!!!" so she gave us a bigger evil eye and started 2 fone the school. Hehe eh'xcelent....the gym comp went well. I was happy with my results. 9 and 8.5's :D
The Bub's party. Felt sick and nearly fell asleep. Her Dad had a beaut guitar
I was so exhausted.
Still am. Went and saw "The Terminal" with Tara. 'Twas good.
Annoyed at mother who won't let me go out 2nite!!! Arrrgghhh! I want my freedom damn you!!

some people say that a women longs to be protected, and a man longs to protect.
i'm sure that's correct to some degree. of course some feminists would disagree with me.
when i was younger i longed to be held in a loving way. it's such a lovely safe feeling being held in the arms of some-one you love, when words are not necessary and actions speak for themselves. it's still true now of course. maybe it's a subconcious female human nature to be wanted to be nurtured and protected? even if we don't all admit to it?

all this bad stuff that's happening...maybe the world's ending. I'm kinda scared

infinity plus 5632.... :)

abusing bates

I have had a fun day today.
Ellen and I bludged in tutor group. We were 'sposed to join in in this "fun" game thing run by Cuthbert Health, we didn't want to juggle, so instead we sat on a desk and talked about formals and formal dress shopping, while violently pegging balls at Bates, while he desperatley tried to shield himself behind pregnant women (poor Doc Mac) It's quite fun to abuse Bates, he's so helpless.... Eh'xcelent
I'm in ICT now and RENATA is away, so we hav that weirdo Mr.Hall dude.
Blogger wasn't working last night, and I had a whole blog done. I clicked publish and it wouldn't publish, so I clicked back then all my blog had gone!! So I typed it ALL again, then went 2 press Ctrl + C to copy, but I accidentally pressed Ctrl + Shift and deleted it all!!! So I wrote it again, then saved it on my computer. But it has now come up and worked, so that is good. Now i don't have to fiddle. Stupid computers. It's so annoying when computers don't work!
It's strange, that I am really happy right now (and yesterday) yet heaps of people have asked me what's wrong, when for once nothing is wrong!! haha...random

a passion for His word

It is so so so so so hard to 4give and it is so so so so so hard not to want revenge.
This is where this verse helps: 2 Corinthians 5:10
For all of you who know what I'm talking about, you'll be thinking, well why does Beth need to 4give? It's not like what Jack did was to her!
But it was to my friend. My good friend. And when my friends are hurt, I am hurt as well.
It makes me so angry. What he did was so cruel and so unjust and its so hard to 4give...argghhh

But apart from the fact that everyone is breaking up (3 couples in 2wks) and everything is in anarchy, life is v. v. good. I am so extreamley blessed, and I have so many gr8 relationships in my life. I am so thankful. Everything is just perfect. I have decided that I am not going to be frustrated about what I was frustrated about b4 nemore and I'm just going to sit back and let God do his thing. In time Beth...in time... Ecclesiastes 3:1 3:11

God is doing so many gr8 things in my life at the moment! Some cool evangelistic stuff. Jesus and the Gospel and spreading the word gets me so passionate sometimes. I am excited, enpowered and passionate about reading and living His word. Yay!! And I know this may be a bit early to think about now (but knowing me of course I would!) but I am maybe considering a career in ministry? Youth ministry. It would be wonderful to help youth in the amazing ways that my youth leaders have helped me! I luv ya guys!! Prob. part time. So then I could still do primary school teaching as well. My two passions...yay!!

And here is just a beautiful verse that I found in my reading last night. It gets me so excited! I actually found it for a friend of mine, but I thought I would share it with you all!!
Jeremiah 29: 11-13

life is v. good
i can't exactly remember what I was going to say in this post
but that pretty much sums up how I'm feeling right now
a passion 4 god...
i'm gonna change
i''m gonna reflect Jesus more
i'm determined
i'm gonna make it

feelings

The world is so cruel.
It's so hard to forgive.
I prayed for Jess today. I prayed soo hard. I've been praying about her for a long while now.
I hope she can find the strength to forgive, and find comfort in Jesus.

I had a nice visit 2day by Monty, Luke and Tim1.
They stayed 4 'bout 2hrs. We just hung around and bummed.
My theory that Mimi hates guys was once again proved correct.
So was the theory that guys actually do enjoy reading girls mags. ;)
Had Small Group at the Church Centre this arvo.
Was fun, even though I started to feel sick again and had some more hallucinations.
SG challenged me to think about forgiveness and being humble.
Nice work on your 1st study Rach!! :D

Wow. I'm such a lucky girl...and I so don't deserve any of it.
Thanks God.
I really am trying to be a better person.

Lord Of The Flies: Duke of Ed Style...

"The story of how our group turned into a bunch of savages...
It's amazing no1 died...
Wait...what DID happen to Clementine??!?!?"

Duke of Ed camp was so bad. It started off with Hannah and I's very apprehensive bus trip to "The Hole" (aka. Camp Somerset - Colo River) and fathoming WHY anyone would live in such a place?! (*cough* Simba *cough*)
We arrived, and after tackling people for our bags, walked down the hill to base. We started screaming madly when our worst nightmares had come true - Simba, our arch nemesis (plus about 20 xtra kgs) - was standing there with her evil smile on her face. She actually remembered us and we were terriffied. Luckily she wasn't our group leader, but she was Jess's!!

We had to camp at base the first night. But it was fun, because we had 1) nice food 2) secret parties 3) girl talk/stresses and 4) a TENT CITY!!
I was trapped into being in a tent with Kiera and Jacki. But at least our tent stayed upright, unlike Annie and Ali's!! It was hilarious fun in our tent though. I shoved chips up Jacki's nose. We were screaming with laughter, and Huge who was patrolling came and tapped on our tent saying "Last warning girls! Who is it in there anyway?" And I'm like (in mi most sarcastic voice) "Ummm....Mel...and....Julia...and....Kiera!" And she's like, "Oh, what a combination!!" and Jacki and I were in fits of laughter again. Then we tried to have a serious conversation (2 test Jacki and Kiera, the "immature ones") Kiera passed, but Jacki DID NOT. She couldn't say "How's Luke?" without putting on a voice and/or giggling. Actually, she couldn't even say "How are you?" without doing that! And it was really scary cuz Huge was standing over our tent, and we could see her silhoutte, and I'm like, "Mrs.Hughes...could you please go..please....we can see you Mrs. Hughes..." and she's like, "Shhh...." and we're like, "Please...please!!" then she pretends 2 go away, by making those fake little footsteps on the ground, and I'm like, "Mrs. Hughes I can still see you!!" It was a hilarious 1st night....

Then in the morning we got up, and after brekkie, started our hike. It was the same route that my group took at Yr9 Camp, only the exact opposite direction. The hike up the mountain wasn't as hard as we thought it would be, so our group were thinking, "Yeh...this is easy...it's all good" Kiera sprained her ankle 20mins into the walk. Then our groupwork wasn't too good, and people were getting cranky at each other. Then the blisters started to come up. We had fun singing medleys though, and using the radio. The funny thing was on the walk we were turning into "Lord of the Flies". We appointed each other names (and I know people r gonna disagree on these so don't even bother commenting 2 say they're wrong) Hannah and I - Sam and Eric, Mel - Percival, Sarah- Maurice, Kiera - Ralph, Lauren - Jack, Julia - PIGGY!, Bubs - The Lord of the Flies/Pig and Jacki - Simon, because she was most likely to turn insane, which she was in the walk, with all her screaming. We painted on our faces in charcoal. We really looked like savages. And we were gonna sacrifice Piggy that night. Eh'xcelent. Our group then got the radio, and chanted into it, in our most freaky voices, "Kill the pig, cut her throat, bash her in! Kill the pig, spill her blood, bash her in!" Which then transmitted out to the leaders and the other groups radio's, who were extreamly freaked out! Hehe...

"A group of girls...alone in the bush...no adult supervision...who knows what will happen?"

Everything was going relativley well, espescially our renditions of the "7th Heaven" song, until we got up to our "bush-bashing" route. We were supposed to go off the trail and straight into the bush, after we passed what Susi (our leader) called, "The Big Curve". What we didn't know then, was that we tunred off waaay to early, what we thought was "The Big Curve" so was not. We ended up going down a ravine. Yes, a ravine. 4 about an hour and a half. We were totally lost. And we lost radio contact from Susi, and it was v. scary!! Our whole group like totally died down there. I sprained my ankle, then rolled it again 3 times after that. Seriously this was like a vertical drop we were climbing down, over boulders and trees and moss, it was one of the hardest things I hav eva had to do in my whole entire life. Then I collapsed from dehydration (I didn't know it was dehydration at th time) But 4 all you people thinking, "Why didn't she drink water the silly girl?". Then I must tell you - I did! 2.5 litres as well! But it was so scary, cuz mi head was about 2 explode, and everything was kinda swimming in the air, and I was like, no, I'll keep on going, then everything went black, and I fell down on this rock thing and everyone was calling my name, and I couldn't hear them, and it was really scary!! I took a Nurofen, but it didn't help much. Obviously, cuz I needed water not medicine, but I didn't know that 'till later so yeh. We kept on going down this damn ravine. And when we FINALLY got 2 the bottom, we had landed in "Ferrari Farm", some random guy's private property!! Examining our map later, we realised that we had gone down the steepest possible slope we could have gone down!!Where we were supposed to go down, the contours were like 1cm apart (gentle slope) and where we went down they were about 2mm apart (STEEP slope!!) Once we landed on the bottom, we collapsed on the ground, not saying anything. Then Kiera piped up by saying "Now, whoever wants 2 speak must have THE CONCH!!" And she held up this massive rock. We all just exploded in laughter, it was hilarious!

" "Bring the conch, Kiera! Bring it with you!" Kiera pauses to consider the request, then throws away the conch without a thought, smashing it into a million little pieces..."

" "What did the breaking of the conch symbolise?" Hammy would ask...
"The loss of sanity", our class of intellects would answer....
Mwhahahaha...."

Then our radio contact was restored. And man Susi was pissed. We walked out of "Ferrari Farm" and met up with her. She told us we had probably failed, because we had missed a checkpoint. This was the most demoralising part of the whole trip. Just imagine...you do all your community service...all your physical activity...all your skill...then you go on a hike 4 5 hours...then fall down a ravine...it's one of the hardest things you've ever had to do, to not stop and keep on going...you're absolutley exhausted...the some-one comes and tells you that it will prob. be all 4 nothing!! It was so upsetting. I was near tears. Our group trudged the whole 4km back to where we were 'sposed 2 be (yes we really did get that lost!!!), in silence. By the time we got back to our campsite, we had been hiking for 7.5 hours, and we were all injured, in various ways and extremities, and just totally, totally bummed.

But the night did go up from there. I was in a dinner group with Jacki and Kiera. While everyone else was sitting around the fire, eating their dinner, we were sitting, freezing, outside our tent, cooking (with our new, less shiny trangia (Kiera was outraged that Julia had stolen our super-shiny one) ) under the "AWNING!!!!" (ok, dont mind me, personal jk there) Mwhahaha... While Kiera and I had our gourmet dinners, Jacki had these disgusting noodles, that had a salty-soapy aftertaste, that I poured too much water over, accidentally-on-purpose, then she attempted to salvage them by adding some of my Beef Stock from a packet of Maggi Noodles I didn't decide to cook, then shoved her soggy, salty-soapy, beef powdered excuse 4 noodles, in a pita-pocket, and ate it cold. It was so yucky!!! After dinner we attempted to go to bed, even though the smell of the drop-toilets was floating over us...I was in a tent with Lauren and Mel. Mel and I were on a high, and had fun screaming obscenities out everywhere and at everyone. (in a nice way of course) Julia didn't approve, but even Lauren and Sarah (the one whom we all thought was innocent, whom we all now know she is not! hehe) got into it! Then Sarah sat outside our tent, and used Bub's head torch and did a finger puppet story for us, about 2 meterosexual bunnies, who, at my request, were eventually mauled by a stray wolf. It was sooo hilarious. It was a damn cold night that night though!! Then Mel and I woke up in the morning, and realised that our tent had been left open!!!

We spent the next hour packing things up, in extreme pain, from our frostbitten fingers. It was only a 3hr hike that day, and by then we had found out that, thanks to Mrs.Hughes, we had not failed! Yay! If we had failed, we decided that we would sell our story 2 "Today Tonight" and "A Current Affair". And we kept our disgusting brown face wipes to use as evidence. Eh'xcelent... The hike back was easier. Although my ankle started to hurt about 5mins after we started walking. But walking up that hill, 4 an hour, it was the most pain my ankle has ever been in. Because I could not take it easy, and limp, I had to put my whole weight on my ankle, and every time I took a step, it twisted in this retarded way, and was such excrutiating pain. I actually got blisters over my hands from holding my stick that I was using to walk on, that's how much I was relying on it. But we all made it up that mountain. Then it was a flat fire trail the rest of the way. We sung more songs on the way, and talked about how cool it would be if they made our camp that we just went on a reality TV show, because it truly would be hilarious. Once we got to the end we got picked up and taken back to base camp. By then I just couldn't walk at all. But the trip back was so fun. We made up our own ending scenario to "Lord of the Flies: Duke of Ed Style" which goes something like this:

"The car arrives to pick us up...
Leaders: Oh, you must have had so much fun. Like Coral Island...
Group: exchanges evil glances...
Leaders: Come on, hop in the car, we'll get you back to civilisation and fix you up.
The group and leaders hop into the van. As the car is driving off, you see the groups shifty eyes, then hear a scream as the leader is attacked, and the car swerves off the road..."

We sung (or should I say SCREAMED) Love Song Dedications all the way back to base camp. A 1/2hour drive, and we didn't stop screaming the songs the whole time. "Near, far whereEVER you are!!!" It was hilariously funny.
The hallucinations started again once I got back to camp. Once I explained my symptons to Mrs.Hughes, it was then that she informed me that I had been dehydrated for the last 24hrs and I didn't know!! My eye wouldn't stop twitching, and things were going black, then swimming round, and there were like ripples in the air, and whenever I looked at something it shrunk. It was scary and I felt sick, not to mention I couldn't walk. Jess didn't fare too well either, she had to carry 2 packs (cuz Maddy couldn't walk) on her hike, and came back completly delirious, throwing up everywhere, and not being able to walk properly. So we were all pretty stuffed up when we came back. And some people (*cough* *cough*) were very tired and snappy at everyone. All I can say is, DON'T TAKE UR TIREDNESS OUT ON OTHERS!! I didn't, so you can too. Once I got back 2 school, I was struggling to carry my pack and walk up (cuz the stupid bus dropped us like heaps far from the school), and Mrs.Hughes was so nice, she walked with me, cuz all my friends abandoned me, and didn't even wait for me, and Huge did and was really, really sweet. She was so nice this whole camp, she almost made me feel guilty to how mean I am to her. I got back 2 school, and fell on the ground and cried. That's how bad it was. Just plain horrible. Yes, there were fun times, but it was still so horrible and I'm not going to do Silver. So now I get the day off school, and this blog has taken me over an hour and a half to write, and I am sure there are sooo many funny things I have 4gotten 2 write!!!
But adios, amigos 4 now...
Blogging off,
A very messed up Beth

"Where's Clementine??!?
Didn't we have a group of 10......
Mwhahahaha... *shifty eyes*"

Reminiscing

I realised that I am a very lucky person.
I have soooo many gr8 things in my life.
My life has changed so much since last year. I realised today that it is actually September, nearly Xmas. It kind of just hit me. The year has gone fast, yet slow, all at the same time. It's been a blur of great happiness and great pain. All the things that come with amazing life-altering change.
I am a totally different person from this time last year.
Even people who haven't know me for very long, like Helen, have noticed that I have changed. And they didn't even see much of the before.
So many people in my life have changed. I was reading Jacki's blog. And it actually made me a bit sad. Jacki hasn't changed. And everyone else has. We are all growing up, falling in love, doing new things, discovering our independance, and she is being left behind in a child's world.
There are so many new things to experience. Growing up can be so fun, and so painful. I had to go through so much hurt to get something good, be happy again, and find clarity in my life and where I am going. Some days I would just think that there would be no end, and the black hole of depression I was in would go on forever, and there would be no light. But the light did come. And I have changed sooo much. Everything's different. A good different though.
I can really love life now. Love God. Love the awesome people in my life.
I still need to focus more on the 'now'. Just enjoy what I have. Look for the positive. Time will eventually satisfy my hunger.
Oh crap I have to go pretty soon.
Duke of Ed camp.
Blogging off,
Beth

(p.s Jacki i'm sorri if that offended you in ne way! I'm glad you can be happy with sticking with your immaturity! :D in time things will change 4 u 2. but dont make wat i said think that where u r is bad!! cuz its not. hehe. luv ya!)

I love good old fashioned romance

frustration blues

I am so frustrated.
I won't go into detail, and I will exert self control, and follow other's leads by agreeing;
Some thoughts and feelings just shouldn't be shared in blogs.

Israel's Katya Pisezky creates a unique illusion with her flexibility at the Corbeil-Essones Tournament

Zarina Gizikova

Gymnastics has done me so much damage:
Firstly, I have bruises all over me. Lots on the top of my pelvic bone from bars. Mainly from doing casts, back-hip circles, front-hip circles, pullovers and toe-shoots...I quite like bars though :D
Secondly, I have all the callouses over my hands, once again from bars. I get tears as well. They hurt.
Then, the worst of them all. My back. I fractured it in two places. This was from floor. For doing things such as, back flips, front somersaults, back walkovers, front walkovers, back limbers, handsprings etc...This is like long term pain and my back is so totally stuffed and I can't do all these hike things and they restricted me from doing all my back stuff so now I can't do all the things I could do b4, and all I can do now is a forward walkover and front somersault (and attempted back limber), and I used 2 be able to do all this other stuff which I now can't.
But I'm not a quitter and I have kept on going even though people tell me to quit, because I love doing it!

Ali Patrick called me very diverse today. Hehe. Cuz I do so many dif. things. She finds out like every day that I do something new. Haha. Somehow she got into her head that I did ballet! Ha. I love Ali. She's such a champ!! She's mi Maths buddy. Mr. Ryan moves us around randomly, and he moved me RIGHT to the front, because I was at the back and talking too much. Bad move Mr. Ryan. He put Ali and I together, and we r like crazy!! We talk sooooo sooooo fast!! Rapidly. Hardly anyone can understand us. And he keeps on turning around the whole lesson saying things like, "No Ali and Beth! What you bought while shopping this weekend is NOT relevant to the y intercept point-slope form of x!!" Haha. But he wasn't here 2day. So we did NO work. And talked the whole time. And the sub totally let us. It was so cool!! Ali was so naive. She didn't know that Kings Cross existed. I told her ALL bout Porkies. It was hilarious! Ali is so much fun :D

Attack of the Blinding Pants

Cummy wore rainbow hippy pants with a baggy purple top and a rainbow head scarf. Hippy to the max.
Hannah and I followed her in amusement.
The rest of our group chased after us. They thought we were gonna tease her or something. "Nooo!! Of course not!"
We ditched our group. They are too easy.
The chase followed.
Cummy joined up with Goth Bob.
Being eyed up and down in disbelief...what you are wearing girl is a crime...
"Um...excuse me. Where did you get your pants?" (stifled sniggers)
"I made them myself!" she snapped.... (she'd obviously been bagged out a lot already bout her 'outfit')
"Oh, they're "beautiful"...."
We run off sniggering 2 go to Dance..meeting up with with 52-yr old Darrio!! Our dance teacher!! He's 52!!!! And he's going on tour with Usher and he's gonna be the first person over 50 ever to have gone on a Hip-Hop tour. He seriously looks like 26...its scary.
He annouced the disbeleiving news of his age after our last lesson with him 2day.
We finally finished our dance :D
I think we're performing it at Middle School Assembly or Dinner or something.
It looks soooo cool.....
And I love the song. I quite like Hip Hop/Rap.
Argh! D of E camp 2moz and it's raining! I'm gonna DIE!!!!!
Jack is VERY clingy. I'm scared.

Watching the Fashion Channel...

This disgusts me..

Couture Models...what more can i say?
I'm into fashion..but this is just wrong!
I was watching Haute Couture Paris (automne - hiver 2004/2005 range) this afternoon and I felt like throwing up!! I think Couture modelling and Runway has got to be the worst! They totally promote this look. Some models collapse whilst at these shows and they just pick them up again, and don't even question anything. Swimsuit, Commercial and Photographic modelling is more healthier, though still...
Sometimes I can't believe I actually modelled...and considered continuing..I just couldn't live like that. Sure, modelling is fun, but, ahhh, it's just so not worth it. I'm more content now just immersing myself in all the fashion stuff...altho sumtimes i look back and think.....mmmm

Final Verdict: Yuck Yuck Yucki!

Ow. I just got eletrocuted by my brother's CD player.
It hurts...a lot

Lockers and Thoughts...

Georgie got stuck in a locker today. It was HILARIOUS. Happened at lunch. And all her friends were taking photos and our group was crowding around and she was near tears because she just COULD NOT get out. The end of lunch bell rang and everyone is like "shit!!". Kranny walked past and we all crowded round the locker so she couldn't c Georgie, and Kim pretended 2 cry and we pretended to comfort her. It worked like a charm. It was so funny tho! Then Huge came 2 try and comfort Georgie and get her out. And she couldn't. So we had to go get the tradesmen dudes, and they were in disbelief, and the two youngest, Irish ones wanted 2 take pics. So we marched back there and wen the young guys saw her they started cacking themselves and had to run out of the room! It was HILAROUS. Georgie eventually got out, without them having to cut the locker to pieces, which is what they were gonna have to do. It made my day though...hehehe....

My two new loves: Mochas and Country Music

Haloscan has been doing some strange things latley...

I love Rach's train of thought.

I discovered the joy of dissecting eyes today.

I'm dreading Duke of Ed camp.

(I can't stop being a bitch!! Argh......)

"Jess and Jack. They are like sooo totally hot right now. They're what EVERYONE is talking bout. The beauty of loudspeaker phone..." Hehe....

Isn't life great? :D

Sweet Southern Comfort

I am drowning in French grammer.
Today has been stressful.
V. stressful.
I had a Geo Test 2day and I didn't study, I wrote notes, but left them at home! Haha.
I didn't know the answer to the first question (great start, ay? ;) ) which was "What is the definition of a wildfire?", so I wrote..."A fire that is wild" Well...how great was that! haha...
But I went to guitar, so that cheered me up!! Andy made me a mocha (4 any of you who don't know, it's like a hot chocolate with coffee in it) and I LOVED it!! And it was good because it woke me up...i was literally 'bout to collapse! And Andy gave me his $1000 guitar 2 have 4 a week!! Because he is putting down the action on mine, and it will be easier to use his, with the lower action, to play the Sweet Home Alabama hard plucking bit. SO I GET HIS GUITAR!!! It's soooo beautiful...I love it soooo much......
And also, I'm going to the formal! Yay! :D
And I have now downloaded my new favourite song on the computer!! It's called "Sweet Southern Comfort" by Buddy Jewell..it's sooo cool....and I LOVE the video clip!! Mel and I have discovered the beauty of good country music, while discovering I had the country music channel on mi TV (I knew it was on Foxtel Digital, but i thought you had to pay 4 it) We're just like, "I love this channel!!" And were sitting there smiling and "awwwing" while watching Buddy Jewell's video clip... :D

"Catchin' catfish on the river;
Chasin' fireflies by the creek.
Kissin' Gary Williams' sister,
On the porch, homecoming week.
With rusted cars and weepin' willows,
Keepin' watch out in the yard.
Just a snapshot of downhome Dixie,
Could be anywhere you are,

In Carolina or in Georgia,
Open arms are waitin' for ya.
Louisiana, Yellow Rose of,
San Antone.
Arkansas, Mississippi,
Old man river whispers to me:
Carry on, carry on:
Sweet Southern Comfort, carry on."


Doesn't it just make you love the country soo much, and make it seem so romantic...awww :D